Babies

I want to have babies. So far, this is not happening. Its been almost 8 months now! 

I went to a OBGYN a few months ago to try to figure out what was wrong and I had a bad experience. He asked how long we had been trying (5 months) and then metaphorically rolled his eyes at me like I was WAY overreacting and explained how 50% of couples dont conceive in 6 months and it is totally normal. I replied that I know it could be fine but I want to be checked anyways because I dont want to wait another 6 months to be tested if it was a simple problem. If the tests were normal I would breathe a little easier and be more patient. So reluctantly he decided they would check out my hormone levels. I asked to get George tested as well and he refused to until I was ruled out. So fine, I would do this hormone test. I went to the desk to schedule it and it had to be on day 28 of my cycle. That was the middle of the week I was to be in Texas. The day 28 was because my cycles are typically long (5-6 weeks) so this would theoretically be my "day 21".  Knowing that, I asked if I could just come in right before I leave and again right after I am back, wouldn't that give better info anyways? No. My doctor said no. To wait ANOTHER month for day 28. That was extremely frustrating, but I had no choice. 

Day 28 of the next cycle I went into the office at my time and sat there in the waiting room for over half an hour. I finally got called back and they took one vial of blood and I was done. No doctor or anything, WHY DID I WAIT SO LONG!? Anyways... A few days later I got a phone call saying my progesterone was really low and either I did not ovulate or they took it on the wrong day. I was glad to hear that something was wrong. As backwards as that is, it was a relief to know that I have begun the path to fixing it rather than waiting until next January. -.-  I was a little annoyed that they didn't do more samples. wouldn't it make since if they are thinking it might be 28 instead of 21 they do the test at both days? The conclusion was I need to come back again on day 28 of the next month. Then I moved to Boston.


I found a reproductive medicine/infertility clinic near our house in Boston because it is simpler that way. We went in to our first appointment (OUR, not MY, it was nice) and after only a short wait time we saw the Doctor in his office. He got some background info on why we were there and how he could help us. I love that he asked us these things, not a nurse. Then he said we need to do a full cycle evaluation to see what is going on, and we need to test George as well. Testing on day 1, 3, 10, etc. To track my hormone levels through the cycle. That seems SO MUCH more reasonable and useful. I never got scoffed at for it only being 7 months or anything. He took me seriously, as he should.

Yesterday was day 1, so they had me come in this morning (since day 1 was after 3pm) for the tests. I walked up to the counter, was taken directly inside for blood, then directly over to the ultrasound room and had that done. Then I was free to leave. In-out-done. I dont think I have ever seen a doctors office that efficient. We were there for maybe 20 minutes total. It gets even better. They do all the testing there, so hours later I was called with my results and further instructions. HOURS. I also liked their whole attitude to the process. They had a little pink book in the waiting room that you are free to write in and share stories with future visitors or read the stories that are there. It was nice to read about people praying for success on the IVF they were about to get or gushing about their pregnancy with twins via IUI.


I feel so much better about everything now. I am sure I am in good hands and they will help us figure this thing out and have babies.


In other news, Thomas was helping/slave driving George to work on his resume and apply for jobs last night. I think there are 2 he is interested in so far. Thomas is good for us =)

Life changes

George and I are now living in Boston, MA. To anyone who knows me, this is a shock. 

We had a house in Raleigh, George had a place at NCSU, we had puppies. I know all that. We needed to move. The grad school program was not working out for him there for various reasons. I didn't really like it there. I can't really pinpoint why. But here in Boston, it seems better. Thomas, a good friend of George since childhood, lives in the same complex as us. He is just one of those people that you cant help but feel emotionally stable around, which I think both of us need. George is trying to get a job at the same place Thomas is at, which will be great. Anyways we still own the house in Raleigh for now and we only have a 6 month lease in case this was a bad idea and we want to go back. The puppies have new homes and I have gotten updates from Cygnus' new family and it seems really good for him.

As George and I were packing (ALONE! Where were all our friends!?) we went out for lunch, and I seemed to snap out of my video game hungry trance (as I had been denied them for a few days) and I came to some realizations. I decided from now on I will only play video games up to 4 hrs a day, to be weaned down to 2 hrs in coming months. And no MMORPGs at all. I have noticed how much they are consuming my life and how unhealthy they are letting me become. That might be part of the problem with the house in Raleigh, I had no friends to come over and make me stop, George was having his own issues and playing along with me, and there was no one to tell me it was so unhealthy to just play all day. I am not saying games are bad, what I was doing with them is. Not wanting to take the time to get up and cook because I wanted to keep playing, not wanting to sleep, or do much of anything.

In this same line of thought, I also have decided to tough it out, take the last class for my B.S., and take the MA teaching exams. I will get my license by December. Even if I never use it (I want to be a SAAM) it will be nice to have a backup plan that is already in place. I got my study books and I am not doing so bad on the practice exams.

As far as trying to get pregnant, (we have been trying for 7 months now) the tests came back to say I have low progesterone, so I will need drugs to make me ovulate to be able to have a baby. I honestly dont think I have been happier to hear that a test was abnormal. Yes I have to take meds, but they understand WHY its not working, rather than telling me to be patient. I am not so crazy after all =) They need to do the same tests this month to confirm and they need to check George to make sure everything is fine there, and then it could happen!

I have also decided- last night- to pull myself together and actually do something about my medical issues. (I have postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome.) I have been told so many times that working out will help me, but it just feels miserable for a while. I need to push through it and feel better. Also I thought long and hard about it, and I think I AM improving, which is great news! Many people develop the disorder in mid-teens and it starts getting better mid-twenties. Not everyone gets better, and as is common with most chronic illnesses, I felt like there was no hope. But I am starting to get better, so I should hove lots of hope!

So, goal for December: Have a B.S., MA teaching certificate, eating healthy, exercising every day, and pregnant. We will see how all that goes, hopefully well. =)